Monday, July 14, 2008

The Dining Room Table

Gratuitous post! I came home from work this morning at 7:30 and was met with the strangest sight:



What the heck? Let's look a little closer, shall we? Item number one:


Not horribly unusual to find a screwdriver and a pair of pliers on the dining room table. On a napkin. Not unusual at all. Maybe someone was eating watermelon for dessert last night?

Item number two:



Yes, I know it looks nasty. My husband had this blow dryer when we got married 16 years ago. I think that brown stuff is rust. The Hunny no longer has hair, and I never dry my hair. It sits under the bathroom counter waiting for drying emergencies to strike.


Item number three:



Ummm. Okaaaay. The Hunny bought this a few weeks ago when we had houseflies trying to take over our world. I told you about that, didn't I? How I was catching them in mid-air with my bare hands? He could have saved us the cash, since I got most of them. Mr. Miaggi I'm not, but the flies are gone. So why was this out?

I asked him about it while he was driving home for lunch (I love that he works close enough to come home for lunch!). The pliers and screwdriver were out to take apart the keyboard for the Mac. SOMEONE was breaking the no-eating-at-the-computer-desk rule and there was chocolate all over the keyboard. Could have been a fudgsicle. Could have been a chocolate bar - which means someone's not sharing. But chocolate stopped up the works. And it had to be taken apart. While I was gone.

Rather than wait for me to take care of it (I offered), the Hunny washed it. Yeah, at least that's what I think he said. Hence the blow dryer, trying to dry it so it could be used. And this would explain the phone call near midnight last night when I was filing papers, asking for the password for my laptop.

He didn't explain the flying insect killer till he got home. Then he showed me. Seems he went to the fruit stand yesterday and picked up fresh produce. Along with it he picked up fresh flies. Watching, horrified, I saw him grab the can, walk into the kitchen and spray in the general direction of the food. Then he said, "Wash the fruit before you eat it." Thanks. Glad I didn't have that peach for breakfast.

So there you have it. What's on YOUR dining room table?

Until I write again ...

Flea

22 comments:

Marguerite said...

My dining room table is in storage. In pieces.

I haven't seen it for over a year and it will be at least a few more months before we're reunited. :(

Snooty Primadona said...

Actually, you can put the entire top of the keyboard in the dishwasher and it works great. We've been doing it for years. Just nothing below the rubber floppy cover can go in.

Works like magic! Now go and tell your hubby that he's a genius, lol.

Coffee Bean said...

I've got something for YOU on my blog!

Trisha said...

Well - technically speaking, I don't have a dining room table. Primarily because I don't have a dining room. Well, I do - technically - have a dining room but it is now the music room and home to my beautiful baby grand piano so - a table just wouldn't fit. I do have a kitchen island though that is often the scene of such mysteries as the one you encountered. I have learned over the years that it is never what I would think it is!

Tranny Head said...

What's on my table? A broken down babyproof lock that Sumo destroyed . . . some brochures that BEG people to buy my stupid condo . . . and a container of butt paste!

Karen said...

Life just sorta takes an interesting turn when you're not there, huh?

Karen Deborah said...

never never spray your food with RAID, lawdy mercy. Educate that manok that is not approved for human consumption and you will mess up you kidneys and liver BAD!!!
the chocolate in the puter and blowdry is pretty funny

Beth from the Funny Farm said...

Oh.. my. You have those little fruit flies. I hate 'em too!

Mine is usually cleaned off with the mail laying on it for a couple of hours each day. Right now, sitting on the table, there is a donut inside a box SCREAMING my name!

imbeingheldhostage said...

well. I am going to text my hubby an apology right now. I had a fit about a few documents being left on ours....

Mental P Mama said...

I am impressed that he put those tools so neatly on that napkin. My table is clean because we used it Saturday night, and I cleaned it off afterwards. I do need to go get the dying flowers off it...

asthmagirl said...

Napkins, a chihuahua harness and a bicycle helmet.

QueenofPlanetHotflash said...

on my table:
the charger for my camera
a lamp
78 cents
Dristan
a DVD
a candle
a bottle of sand from my daughters trip to Hawaii

Harmony said...

My dining room table is surprisingly clean!

April said...

I love the total lack of rhyme or reason to all the items on the table! LOL

Laura ~Peach~ said...

lol too funny!!!!!!!

Connie Pombo said...

OMG, that's hysterical!

My dining room table now belongs to my son who is home for the summer. He "camps" there. We have a granite table, so it can withstand anything (almost), including: tennis equipment, baseball bats, laptops (plural as in more than ONE), dirty sneakers, smelly hats, the Sunday Newspaper (isn't it Tuesday?), my ceramic bowl from Italy which is a catch-all for keys, wallets, therapy bands(Mark's from physical therapy), and right now our cat, Bianca, is taking a nap in the bowl.

Aren't you sorry you asked?

HUGS!

Anglophile Football Fanatic said...

Puzzles. My Puppy's puzzles.

Anglophile Football Fanatic said...

Puzzles. My Puppy's puzzles.

Lori said...

Evidence that lunch was had: 3 placemats- one is a multicolored cloth (mine), another has Spiderman and some of his webs (my son's) and a third has dinosaurs (for the little guy I keep on T/TH)- My water glass (on the placemat to avoid a ring), salt and pepper shakers and some sale flyers from the Sunday paper I want to go thru. Before we moved here my dining room table had candlesticks and a vase of flowers on it. The mess was left for my kitchen table. But now we have no formal dining room (yet!) and the dining table resides in the kitchen because it won't pass thru the door of the front bedroom that will one day become my dining room. Whew! TMI, I know.

Mighty Morphin' Mama said...

Um Yikes! Is the keyboard okay?
and so much for organic fruit:)

zobabe said...

A keyboard/synthesizer in the case
Sewing machine
Cans of wood stain
A cat bed
A box of stuff gathered from other places that never made it to their real homes
Fabric scraps
A stack of absolutely essential papers that are so important I have no use for them
Some floppy disks (for the keyboard)
Another box of stuff (??)
An oil filter, new, of course
Garbage bags
A ceramic cat trivet
Books (Bible, Spiritual Mothering)
Advil

Hm. And you wonder why it's so hard for me to get organized. Where to start??

Colleen said...

(going by memory here since I'm at work)
beach towels
one of several diaper bags
pair of baby shoes
sheet of Mickey Mouse stickers
kid's windbreaker, size 3T

I think that's it. It was worse before Coop's b-day party this past weekend.