Monday night I realized that there was no NyQuil left. My Hunny offered to run out and get some, but I had a brilliant idea. One I was sure would work.
Yeah. I'm not so great when it comes to brilliant ideas.
After everyone's asleep (I was hoping, initially, that I'd just be able to fall asleep - hah! Haha! Ahahahaha! Not), I creep out into the kitchen, having already taken DayQuil, and start some water in my tea kettle. Grab the Honorary Texan mug that Snooty sent me. Scoop in some Russian spiced tea (why's it called Russian? And the version I make doesn't have any tea - just some Tang, lemonade mix, sugar and spices. Cinnamon, cloves. Maybe some nutmeg. Other stuff. Dill, maybe? Black peper and sea salt? A hint of sauerkraut, perhaps?). Then head for the liquor cabinet.
Now, when I say liquor cabinet, I really mean the back corner of the corner cabinet in the kitchen where the Christmas brandy is stashed. Christmas brandy? I bought it three years ago for making home made eggnog and that's pretty much all it's been used for. You know where this is headed. Isn't it the alcohol in NyQuil which helps us sleep?
So the cup has the powdered mix in it. Speaking of which, if the powder is all clumped together, is it still safe to drink? Anyway, I pour brandy in the cup. A little splash just doesn't seem like it will do the trick. Put me to sleep, I mean. So I pour some more. That didn't look like quite enough. So I pour some more. About a quarter of the coffee mug full. But it's mixed with powder, so it's not as much as it looks, right? Right? I don't think there's a quarter cup of alcohol in two NyQuil gel caps, but whatever.
The kettle whistles and I fill the mug. The first sip burns its way down, and not because the water is hot. Now I understand all those cowboy novels when they talk about the likker burning the guy's throat raw. Yikes!
But I want to sleep, so I wipe my weeping eyes, blow my nose and take another sip. Ahhh. Much better. Wipe the eyes again. Is that blood on the tissue? No. Another sip. So much better. I can do this. And yes, I start feeling woozy.
Before I know it, I'm at the bottom of the cup. Wishing I had another. Knowing I shouldn't. You'll be proud of me - I went straight to bed. And slept. For about five minutes before I had to BLOW MY FREAKIN' NOSE.
Boys and girls - don't try this at home.
Until I write again ...