Happy Funny Bone Monday, everyone! I hope you all had a good weekend? Mine was especially good. I made a double wall Cherokee basket at Marcia's (picture coming this week), and drove home via route 66 (again with the pictures later). And my Hunny spent the weekend in Louisiana. Today's humor will reflect a little of everything, I hope!
A man was riding on a crowded bus, standing room only. The bus stopped and an elderly lady got on carrying a large picnic basket. She stood right in front of the man and grabbed the overhead rail so the picnic basket was above the man's head.
Being a gentleman, he offered his seat to her. She quickly declined as she was only going a short distance.
Soon the picnic basket began to leak. The man felt something drop on top of his head. As he looked up it hit beside his nose and ran down across his lips. He tasted it, looked up at the lady and asked, "Pickles?"
Tee-Boy was playing with some sticks behind his house when he noticed that the outhouse was leaning over towards the bayou. Being the curious little boy that he was, Tee-Boy got the idea to kick the outhouse really hard. He reared back, gave it the biggest kick that he could, and suddenly that outhouse tipped all the way over and fell into the bayou. Within seconds, the outhouse sank to the bottom of the bayou, and Tee-Boy ran to hide in case if anyone was watching.
Later than day, Tee-Boy's papa approached him and asked if Tee-Boy knew anything about the outhouse. Tee-Boy looked at him and replied, "Papa, just like George Washington, I can not tell a lie. I kicked that outhouse as hard as I could, and the thing sunk straight to the bottom of the bayou." Tee-Boy's papa gave him a stern look and said, "You are going to get it boy! Go and fetch me a good stick out the tree!"
Shocked, Tee-Boy asked, "But Papa, George Washington didn't get into trouble when he told the truth, so why are you going to whip me?" His papa explained, "When George Washington chopped down that cherry tree, his papa wasn't in that tree either!"
I especially love one that hits so close to where I called home
Thibodeaux was driving down the road one day when he saw a beautiful woman standing in the middle of it. Thibodeaux hit the brakes and aksed the woman, "What's wrong Miss?"
The lady explained, "My life is over. Nobody cares about me. I want it all to end, so I'm just praying that someone will run over me on this road."
Thibodeaux begged her, "No Miss. Please don't do that. You are beautiful, obviously smart, and you have a full life ahead of you. I'll tell you what. Jump in my truck and I will sneak you onto the boat I am working on. We are heading to France, so you can hide during the journey and we will slip off together in Europe and live a wonderful life." The lady agreed, and Thibodeaux snuck her onto the boat as promised.
For over three weeks, he fed her three meals a day, brought her water, and romanced her in the life boat after the crew went to bed. Eventually, the captain of the ship caught the lady and asked her, "Miss, why are you hiding down in that cabin?"
The lady explained, "I'm so sorry. One of your crew, Thibodeaux, has been hiding me here, feeding me, and romancing me at night on this whole journey to France."
The captian giggled and told her, "No, no. We're not on our way to France. This is just the Chalmette ferry!"
One day Boudreaux went to the car dealership, he brought his best friend Thibodeaux along. He decide to test drive his new car first. So they were going down I-10 and Boudreaux told Thibodeaux to climb on to the trunk and see if his blinkers worked. So Thibodeaux climbed to the back and Boudreaux said "Check the left one first!," and then he turned it on. Thibodeaux said "Mais, Yes. Mais, No."
Boudreaux and Thibodeaux decided to go fishing one morning at the pond in back of Boudreaux's house. It was dark and when they reached the pond they realized they wanted to cross to the other side. But they couldn't walk around and had no boat or pirogue to cross in. Thibodeaux turned to Boudreaux and said, "Mais Boudreaux, how in the heck we gonna get across." Boudreaux said, "No problem, I'm gonna shine this here flashlight across the water and you gonna walk on the beam of light all the way across." Thibodeaux then says, "Mais, Boudreaux, you must think I'm stupid or something, cause just when I get halfway across you gonna turn off the light."
One day, Boudreaux and Clotile were riding their boat at Bayou Benoit when they hit a sunken log and the boat overturned. Clotile didn't have a life jacket on, and she drowned. The sheriff and a bunch of neighbors came by to try to find her, but they didn't have any luck. A week passed and Thibodeaux knocked on Boudreaux's front door.
"Boudreaux, I have some good news and some bad news for you."
"Give me the bad news first."
"Well, the bad news is that we found Clotile. She drowned. We so sorry for you."
"Well go on, what is the good news?"
"The good new is--when we pull her up, we fill two sacks of big blue point crab."
"Mais, where you put her body?"
"Well, Boudreaux. De first time we did so good with the crabs, we decided to leave her in the water one more day."
I am laughing .. tee heeeeeee
Mondays are always better with Flea. Mais oui!
OK. I speak French, but I don't get the "Mais, yes, Mais, no" punchline.
Explain please! The rest were quite funny . . . especially the ferry joke.
Justin Wilson what a hoot!
you did again they are funny!
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